Guilty
by MidnyteEmberRose
Summary: Robin is thinking about what he did to Starfire while recovering from the dust. (Set later during the night of Haunted)


AN: Disclaimer: Don't own any characters or titles of the show so please don't sue me, I'm just trying to have fun.

This story is Robin reflecting back to where he grabbed Starfire's arm while he was under the hallucinations of the dust and how he is dealing with the situation.

GUILTY

*Start of flashback*

'What are you doing?! How could you let him get away?!' Robin growled at Starfire while grabbing her arm tightly. 'You are hurting me.' Starfire whimpered.

*End of flashback*

I groaned and hit my fist against the wall welcoming the painful throbs. I deserved it. No, I deserved more for hurting Starfire like I did tonight. I hurt her both physically and mentally. I'd rather die than hurt her ever again. She had to know this. I didn't realize how hard I had hit the wall until I felt warm liquid running down my fingers. Walking into my private bathroom I washed the blood away, wincing at the stinging pain. Still I welcomed the pain all the same, because like I said, I deserved it. I wrapped my knuckles in a bandage wrap when I heard a knock on my door.

"Robin? Are you okay?" I heard my princess ask. 'She's so sweet. To be concerned of my well being after what I did it just seemed downright improbable.' I thought to myself, shaking my head.

"I'm fine, Star. Come on in." I called to her.

She opened the door, but only took a few steps inside. She, like myself, was in her pajamas. It was the dark purple pants with green flowers on them along with a matching top that I had helped Raven pick out for her for Christmas last year.

"I heard a noise when I was passing by to go to my bedroom." She told me. Her English was really improving.

"I uh…" I stammered, trying to come up with a quick lie as to what the noise could have been.

Starfire gasped, "Robin, what happened to your hand?"

I looked down stupidly as if I had no idea as to what she was talking about. "Oh, I accidentally hit a wall when I was working out earlier in the gym." I said.

She looked at me skeptically.

I didn't think she bought. Scratch that she didn't buy it.

Starfire walked over to me and examined my hand. "Why do you lie to me?" She asked, sadly.

It was only six little words, but it felt as if she had punched me in the gut. I didn't respond.

"You hit the wall on purpose, yes? You are angry with something? At me?" She asked, her voice full of sorrow as she glanced at her right arm.

I could see that she was staring at the bruise on her arm. The bruise I had left. I cupped her chin and turned her back to face me. "I am so very sorry."

Tears spilled down her face as she finally released all of her pent up frustration. The force was almost unexpected and I nearly broke down with her. Then she did something I thought she would never do again.

She hugged me.

Not a bone crushing hug either, but a loving one, like she was telling me that everything was okay now. I knew it wasn't. I was guilty. I pulled her away a little and wiped a stray tear away from her beautiful face.

"Nothing is okay, Starfire. I hurt you and that's not okay, understand?" I said.

She sighed deeply, "May we lie down?"

"Of course." I answered, leading her towards my bed.

She snuggled up against me with her head on my chest. I could feel her heart beat and it made me smile, but it soon vanished when I realized this conversation wasn't over yet.

"May I ask you a question?" She asked rather shyly.

"Yes." I answered, bracing myself.

She bit her lip and stayed quiet for a few minutes. The question was obviously giving her trouble and I began to get worried.

"Stafire?" I asked, pulling her back to me.

"What is that makes you obsess over Slade the way you do?" She finally asked.

"I don't know. I guess…they way he makes me feel worthless, like I can't defeat him on my own." I tried to explain.

"Why must you defeat him on your own? We are a team, are we not? You are not worthless." She assured me.

"Yes we are a team. I just hate feeling vulnerable. I'm the only one on the team that doesn't have any powers, which means I have to work twice as hard to keep up with every bad situation that's thrown in our way." I admitted.

"I understand." She said.

"Do you?" I asked, doubtfully.

"Yes," She looked at me sternly, "Robin, when you were Slade's apprentice I felt that perhaps I was never going to get you back, but you know what? Even though I was upset I was also confused. I knew in my heart that you would never betray us. It did not make sense for you to willingly join Slade when I knew how much you hated him, and when we found out that the only reason you were working with him was to keep us alive, I became overjoyed. But then I became angry. I wanted to rip Slade's head off of his body and feed him to the shrieking glupnorks on my home planet."

"That's the point, Star. He's done so much damage that every time he gets away I felt like I had failed you all as a leader."

She sighed as she pushed strands of hair out of my face, "Robin, he is gone. We all saw him die in the lava."

"How can we know for sure? What if it was just a robot like all the other times?" I asked.

"We do not, but we will be with you if he ever does come back. We'll also be by your side."

I looked deeply into her beautiful, emerald eyes then rolled over so she was underneath me.

She smiled sweetly up at me.

I put my arms on each side of her so she was in between me, scooting back a little to have better contact with her bruised arm. And by better contact I mean kissing it slowly and repeatedly.

"I promise to never hurt you again. Please? Forgive me?" I begged.

"Shh, I do. I do forgive you." She rubbed my back soothingly. "Your mind was not full of the fogginess."

"That's no excuse. I'd rather die than hurt you again." I said sincerely.

She kissed me lovingly making my hormones kick into overdrive. When we finally parted to breathe, I pulled her top up and kissed her firm stomach. She trembled and moaned. I wanted to take this further, but I didn't want to rush her into anything that I knew she probably wasn't ready for. She was only fifteen after all. She's fifteen and I'm sixteen. How much more time did we actually have together? The answer to that was unclear.

"Oh, Robin." She whispered in a way that almost sounded like worship.

"Richard."

"What?"

I tensed for a second. What did I just do? The word just slipped out. I took a moment to compose myself and think about the next move. Because this next move I made it could completely change our relationship together for the better or for the worst. I looked back down into her curious eyes.

"Richard. That's my name. My _real_ name." I revealed to her.

"Richard." She said, seeming to roll the idea around in her mind for a second before kissing me again.

"Thank you." She whispered as we parted again.

"For what?" I asked.

"For opening up to me. Your name is absolutely handsome." She said as she nibbled on my earlobe.

"Handsome?" I asked, rather bewildered.

"Yes," She laughed, "Handsome. Just like you."

I blushed as she kissed me on my forehead. Turned to look at the time and glared when I realized it was almost one in the morning.

"We should probably get some sleep."

"I agree." She started to get off the bed.

"Where are you going, beautiful?" I asked.

"To my room." She answered, uncertainly.

I grinned evilly, "No, you're not." I grabbed her by the wrist and started tickling her.

"Eep! No! Richard, stop!" She begged between fits of giggles. I kissed her after we finally calmed down. She wrapped her arms around me with a yawn. That I took as a sign that everything was absolutely perfect, and I realized as I listened to her heartbeat that my guilt was gone.


End file.
